Garry Shandling was an American comedian, actor, writer, and producer, known for his unique and insightful humor. Throughout his career, he delivered numerous memorable quotes that continue to inspire and entertain people to this day. From his sharp wit to his philosophical observations, Garry Shandling’s quotes encompass a wide range of topics, including life, relationships, and comedy. In this article, we have compiled some of his most notable quotes to share with you.
Read these Garry Shandling quotes
“The world is divided into two types of people: those who understand sarcasm and those who don’t.”
“I’m dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.”
“I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes, but it was the night the clocks are set ahead.”
“The best revenge is living well, and having a good attorney.”
“My girlfriend said to me, ‘Oh, Garry, you’re so sexy! But I just can’t take you seriously.’ I said, ‘You don’t have to, just take me.'”
“It’s better to be known for something you’re proud of than for something you’re not.”
“The pursuit of happiness is the chase of a lifetime.”
“I’m as confused as a baby in a topless bar.”
“I’m dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into staying over.”
“People always ask me, ‘Were you funny as a child?’ Well, no, I was an accountant.”
“I once made love to a woman for six hours and five minutes, but when it was over, she said, ‘You owe me five minutes!'”
“I once made love to a woman who was so beautiful, I cried. And then I cried because I knew she was out of my price range.”
“I’ve actually been dating a homeless woman recently, and I think it’s getting serious. She asked me to move out with her.”
“The more you can increase fear of drugs and crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all the people.”
“I once had a wild fling with a woman from the circus. But then she realized I was just juggling her.”
“I’m in therapy now. I’m trying to find out who I am. Maybe I’m just a reasonable facsimile of myself.”
“Sometimes I wake up in the morning and I go, ‘Gee I look handsome today.’ And then I laugh and laugh because that’s not true.”
“I’m dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.”
“I went out with a promiscuous impressionist. She did everybody.”
“I once made love to a woman who made me feel like a god. Unfortunately, she believed in polytheism.”
“I think I’m gonna get a tattoo over my whole body of me, but taller.”
These quotes are just a glimpse into the brilliant mind of Garry Shandling. His ability to find humor in everyday situations and his unique perspective on life made him a beloved comedian. Whether you’re looking for a laugh or some thought-provoking insights, Garry Shandling’s quotes have something for everyone.
